Task 2Band 6.513 views

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Essay Response

219 words3 paragraphs

Nowadays, some people believe that competition at work, at school, and in daily life is a positive thing, while others think that cooperation should be encouraged instead of competing against each other. On the one hand, competition is a common thing that even kids participating, and many people says that it brings several benefits. I agree that competition can be instrumental because it supports people to improve themselves.

For example, when people take a part in different competitions such as chess, marathons, or mental test, they are supported to develop their skills and fix their weaknesses. In addition, competition often encaurage students and workers to perform better and achieve success. Therefore, it can play an important role in their development. On the other hand, some people believe that cooperation is more important than competition.

They agree that working together helps people achieve certain goals better. However, I believe that too much cooperation may sometimes lead to problems, such as overcrowding or lack of clear responsibility. For instance, if too many people try to cooperate in a competition, it can become not planned and less efficient. In conclusion, therefore cooperation is beneficial in many situations, I believe that competition is more beneficial in education, work, and daily life because it encourages skills to improve and achieve their goals.

Hover over underlined words for details

wordCohesive device
wordOverused
wordGood vocabulary
wordNeeds work

Detailed Feedback

This essay achieved a band score of 6.5. Key strengths include The position is clearly stated and maintained throughout the essay. and Both sides of the argument are addressed.. Areas for improvement: Examples could be more detailed and specific. and Some ideas are not fully developed..

Overall Band Score

6.5/ 9.0
3paragraphs
219words

Get Your Essay Scored

Receive instant AI feedback with detailed band scores for each criterion.

Try Free
Browse more essays →